Sunday, November 23, 2008

Lord, You are my everything

God never fails to send me angels to comfort me when I am getting weak and when I start to question His plans for me. I had posted an entry Let Go and Let God last week and I honestly felt guilty yesterday for worrying so much and not to be able to let go and allow God to solve my worries. Our papers in the immigration are still pending and I worry because the cut off age for me to be included in the application is 21 and I will already turn 20 by December. I really wanted to cry but I kept holding back my tears because I am ashamed to admit that I have such a little faith. I had told my mom about it but she just said that God loves us and not to worry anymore. I was also confused and too worried last night that I couldn't even understand what my Bible is telling me.

This morning during the Sunday mass I was able to kneel down and talk to God. I told Him to take away the feeling of envy that I have towards my batch mates in college because they will already graduate on March and I just feel left out. I saw their pictures and I just wish I am there with them.

I had already accepted God's plan for me about my studies but I guess I was just starting to worry and I know I am ashamed that I will end up going home and just realize one day that coming here in New York is not His plan after all. That's what my mind is telling me. But in my heart and with my faith, I know God had given me enough signs to do what I have done.

I told my Father that I want to trust Him and to help me let go. I told God that I love Him so much and I know that He loves me too. I pray that He will take away everything that is causing my heart to turn black.

Out of nowhere Isobelle, a friend of mine, sent me a text message and I believe that it was God who told her to do so. She doesn't text me that often and this is her first message that contains a verse. She sent me Mark 11:24 which says...

"Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer,
believe that you have received it, and it will be yours."

Also, a while ago my friend Cherry sent me the link to this video.

The video made me cry especially the part when the girl kneel down, pray, let go and just let God help her.

Lord, You are my everything and all I want to do is just follow Your plan.


Lori said...

Good post Paige. Keep leaning on God. Sometimes we all doubt - we're human...but listen to that still small voice.

BTW, I have awards for you. Stop over at my blog:)

John said...

Stay strong in God. Never give in to fear -- it does not come from God and in His love you will always overcome.

Anonymous said...

I believe God has a plan for you whatever country you will end up living in. But I pray your immigration application will soon be treated and decided on positively for you.

I whisper to God said...

God brings us messages is wonderful ways. This post made me cry. It's beautiful in the way that God uses other people to remind us He is near.

Many blessings and love to you.


penlighted said...

Thank you very much for your replies. God is amazing. I praise Him for making me strong everyday.

Anonymous said...

My sweet Paige, God knows what is in your heart. He has heard your prayer and will answer it. Stay strong in your faith and trust in Him. We don't often understand why God does some things in our lives sometimes. All we can simply do is believe and trust that He knows what is best for us. When we trust in Him things always work out for the best. Stay strong my sweet friend! Know that I love you always and when I read your writings and you are struggling within your soul, I feel your pain and send prayers up immediately for you. I may not be where you are physically, but know that I am with you spiritually and I always will.

Anonymous said...

I believe that if the U.S.A. won't have you they will reject something really god. They will regret it. Maybe I should write The President a note on that.

Maria said...

AMEN....Happy thanksgiving dear to you and your family.

The Heart Of Worship said...

Hi Paige.. Good post. This post telling me the same that whatever we prayed for, believe that we already receive it form GOD. HE is faithful and HE keeps HIS promises to HIS child. Don't worry, you will see miracle happen. Amen!

Dr.Bruce said...

Do not be discouraged Paige. God's path may lead you many places, even home. Rest assured that following His path will always be best.

Praying for you