Monday, May 31, 2010


Some people and sometimes us-who-things-we-are-not-like-this-but-truly-we-do-this easily criticize, ridicule and say strong words of dislike because of the belief that telling a person or making them feel that something's wrong about them or how they do things directly is the better option. In some cases it might be but most often, based on my experience and what I've observed, the other party will most likely to just resent because of the feeling of being unaccepted and the "i'm bad and this is who i want to be so deal with it" attitude.

My mom would always remind us (dad, my brothers and I) to encourage and appreciate each other, to find even one single simple thing that we can appreciate from that person before we nicely approach them about their mistake. Honestly, it sounds funny and it's not that easy to do. It takes a lot of self-control to hold your tongue to not to insult and criticize other people, more so to say something nice about them when they do you wrong but it actually works; you can get your message across easier and this way the other person will feel your concern. That person's confidence will be renewed and what you had projected that they are will be instilled to them.

In terms of my journey as a Christian, at times when I stumble, feel discouraged and down, I strive my best to surround my self with other believers and read more about how God had touched other peoples lives. In Romans 1:11-12, Paul said "I long to see you, . . . that I may be encouraged together with you by the mutual faith both of you and me." Surely it feels like you're dragging yourself to go to church, to worship and thank God despite of your troubles but it's an effective way to rekindle your faith and passion. I believe that it's just the enemy's work to make me feel bad and definitely I won't let it win.

Words of appreciation and encouragement are powerful.
Say it; use it more often, you'll be glad you did.


Anonymous said...

You write: "... telling a person or making them feel that something's wrong about them or how they do things directly is the better option." It is. Taking responsibility from a person, acting as a mama, actualizing Mammon, is evil. Give responsibility.

Let me be that person you pity. If you act as mama against me; if you use psychology on me, you disqualify me. That is a defence mechanism of yours: Maybe I, not you, am right. You act thinking of profit. You actualize Mammon.

Feel the beat.


God beats. And that appeal is how
we to The Lord volition owe.
God is a feeling insofar
we feel the beat if veins we are.

penlighted said...

Anders, you're right that we have to tell other people that they are wrong but I don't agree that using strong words of dislike to criticize and ridicule them is a better option.

We might be wrong and their right or we might be right but they don't think they are wrong; but either way I believe that to tell them 100x about their mistake without appreciating something from them will just discourage them to do the right thing.

Appreciate people and encourage them about their good deeds, mention the bad ones but focus more about the good.

For example, a child did something wrong, the parents can remind that child about their mistake over and over again or correct them once and appreciate and encourage them whenever they do something good. I choose the latter.

Anonymous said...

Quite. But make people responsible. Shun psychology. Shun Mammon.

And, on the other hand, do not make yourself the victim of other peoples acts. The evil one will love it if you host his evilness.


Be as salt and be as light.
Give responsibility!
Keep the work of God in sight.
Host not. Shun hostility.

Anonymous said...

But, God reminds me, men are not women. :-)


The raven is not like the dove.
The Spirit shows two kinds of love:
The dove attached proclaims your worth.
The raven cold proclaims your birth.

Anonymous said...

We should not host one another. That is evil. We should be righteous - like the dinar! :-)


Fresh and neat a feeling is,
salt and light like a dinar.
Righteous is the name of this
being which by God you are.