Monday, September 27, 2010

Bliss =)

Not long ago I was too ashamed to go home, to talk to my parents and tell them that it will take me maybe 2 more years to finish nursing school here in New York. Not long ago I spent a joy ride, went to New Jersey with my special friend right after I received my I-am-sorry-you-didn't-make-it letter sobbing about my unfortunate fate and complaining about the rocky journey I am traveling towards my dream of being a nurse while he's giving me his 1000 reasons, yes he came up with that too many reasons about why I should be thankful that I didn't get into the program. Of course I laughed in between but my heart was torn and I couldn't understand why. I pretended I was okay and by the time I got home, I have to hold back my tears in front of my parents as I was telling them I am sorry that I failed. I even failed on hiding my tears.


I am really not sure what happened after that day but I am positive that I kept praying and told God that I trust Him even though my mind was telling me that I will be spending years in devastation island.


Surprisingly, weeks after those moments I was told that I will have a permanent regular schedule at work. I will be working in a luxurious hotel for elders. I had my class schedule ready; I changed my major to Lib Arts: Math and Science. I will be in school Mondays and Wednesdays and I will work Tuesdays, Thursdays, Saturdays and Fridays as an on call.


Working and doing the dirty job sends me to euphoria. I enjoyed giving care and love towards the elders. I give medicines, sponge bath, feed them or bring them to the dining hall, I also change their diapers, clean them after they went, push their wheel chair, bring them to movies or to the park, talk to them, listen to their stories, write my nurses notes...what a bliss! What I do with them doesn't feel like I'm working but instead I am having the same feeling whenever I worship God. I feel happiness beyond words can express. I always end my day with a smile and a thankful heart no matter how the day went. I was called stupid, timid and slow but most of the time I get compliments, hugs and kisses from them. I smile and thank God because this is all that I want from nursing, no more no less.


Aside from my passion for nursing, mathematics also sends me to an elevated state. I feel heaven whenever I have to do math problems. I always wish they require more math subjects in nursing when I was still in the Philippines. I love testing my patience while I do solving. I love to do logic, word problems, measuring, counting, figures, algebra...ah! Well well well... look at what I have to do now! I have to take math courses to finish this degree. I just couldn't believe how fast time flies when you are enjoying; I am doing what I love and studying what I want.


I don't know where He will lead me but it's the first time that I am enjoying the ride. I am enjoying the stops that I have to take. I am living in the present. I don't even have time to figure out what His plans for me or to foresee my future because I am happy enjoying everything. My week is always great. Plus, another bonus gift from Him are the new things that I can do because of the confidence and courage He is giving me, taught by His instruments, my friends from my church community and my family; and also because I can already afford doing it since I already have a job.


I want to pursue nursing right after I graduate from my new major, hopefully with prayers and love I will graduate next semester but of course, take me Lord wherever You want to bring me.


Stumble Upon ToolbarAdd to Technorati Favorites

7 comments:

Driving with Anna said...

Thank you for your honest thoughts. I have spent over a year searching for a job and am now trying to change careers so that I can possibly earn money to help out my family. You are an encouragement to me.

K.Y. said...

I absolutely love your blogs all together!! They are extremely easy to relate to, and read. In so many ways, I have felt how you have, and had some of the same milestones. I look forward to following your blogs.

K.Y. said...

I loved all your blogs!! They are so easy to relate to and true about what happens in the day to day life of many people. I look forward to following up on yours. I have faced many milestones just like you some the same, but then others that are completely different.

joven said...

thanks,this is my site
http://kaminyoon.blogspot.com/.. be a follower..more wedding ideas!

Aaliyah said...

What a very interesting and an informative blogs! There are lots of things to consider in everyday living. I encountered some trials way back then, but still with prayers I just make it through. Live life to the fullest!

Anders W. Ellingsen said...

ROMANCE

My strong desire blessed will sing
and take me from the sore damnation,
from every dull and dying thing
to clear sky and to true sensation.

Called Romance is my saving fowl.
Supported from eternity
its feeling counts for aim and goal,
its heart for sensibility.

Benign but passionate it will
the odds and ends to be a thrill.
The shadow of its wing will be
my dwelling place, my refuge.

Anders W. Ellingsen said...

This last verse is better :-) :


ROMANCE

My strong desire blessed will sing
and take me from the sore damnation,
from every dull and dying thing
to clear sky and to true sensation.

Called Romance is my saving fowl.
Supported from eternity
its feeling counts for aim and goal,
its heart for sensibility.

Benign but passionate it will
let odds and ends unite as thrill.
The shadow of its wing will be
my dwelling place, my refuge!