Fear of the Unknown

Are you eager to know your future? Have you tried fortune telling?

I am and I had. When I was still in the Philippines, my friends and I went to a not-so-old fortune teller, who is also a Christian and I think she had a dream before she "learned" that ability, to know our future. It was nothing serious, we just wanna try. But in fairness to her, what she said about my past, present and future, which is now my present, are all true. I didn't mind the things that she said about my future but I was blown away when she knew and started telling me things about my personal spiritual battle against the enemy.

Before, I went to a fortune teller out of curiosity but yesterday I asked my friend to go there, be my proxy and know my future because I am impatient, worried and anxious. {-_-} teeeheee.. I know, I know. My action shows that I don't trust God. That's why, just a while ago, He scolded/reminded me and His scolding actually made me happy.

Happy because He's there, He can see me and He cares for me. I feel like a child who intentionally does wrong and smile whenever their parents notice and scold them; even though in my case it wasn't intentional but to be scolded by God makes me smile, to be scolded by Him gives me comfort. He scolded/reminded me; I can feel His love. I actually don't have any plans to write an entry today because I have to study for an exam. However, His message for me is something that I really want to share. I am still amaze how He uses my Bible to tell me something.

He gave me Psalm 23.

He said, "To prepare for tomorrow, trust Jesus today."

And in Deuteronomy 18:10-12 He said, "Never sacrifice your son or daughter as a burnt offering. And do not let your people practice fortune-telling or sorcery, or allow them to interpret omens, or engage in witchcraft, or cast spells, or function as mediums or psychics, or call forth the spirits of the dead. Anyone who does these things is an object of horror and disgust to the LORD. It is because the other nations have done these things that the LORD your God will drive them out ahead of you. You must be blameless before the LORD your God. The people you are about to displace consult with sorcerers and fortune-tellers, but the LORD your God forbids you to do such things."

I am not ashamed to admit and share that He just scolded/reminded me. ^_^ I do wrong things but I am confident that I will never be separated from Him. He loves me, I am His daughter.

I consult the Bible and ask Him for signs in almost everything I do. Just almost because there are times that I abruptly decide for something without praying for it. Just almost because like yesterday, instead of praying and talking to Him about my anxieties, I turned to other people. Just almost because I still have my weak moments.

So there, He told me to trust Him and my future will surely be fine.

However, I still have some questions. Are all fortune tellers bad? Not bad as in bad but can we not consider some of them as God's instruments? How about if they are also Christians? The fortune teller that I went to is a Christian, she prays and prayed before she started reading the cards. She didn't use tarot cards, just ordinary playing cards.

In my opinion, I believe that it is only Him who can tell that this one's bad and that one's okay. Not just about fortune tellers but in general. I believe that in everything that we do, may it be good or bad in our eyes, it is only Him who can tell if it is right or wrong because He's the only one who can truly know what's in our heart and our intention for doing things. In my case, I was wrong, my intention was wrong, that's why He reminded me that I have to trust Him.

He prepared the table for me. He is my Shepherd and only provider. I should, I should and I will stop worrying.