Wednesday, March 3, 2010

Love Life...

The first time I felt an attraction towards the opposite sex, which I had perceived as love when I was much younger than I am today, I felt like as if I was in a me and him against the world kind of situation. The things that surrounds me doesn't matter much because I was in love and that he completes me. I thought food tasted better when I ate it with him. The world was so much brighter because he was there. I just couldn't understand why my older brother used to laugh at me because of how I acted and decided about things, I had always included us in everything.

I was already a Christian, a believer, a follower, an active member of a charismatic group when I had my first boy friend but my faith was still young. I, instead of sharing my plans with God, had shared my plans with him. Planned and gave my best to fulfill our plans.

In every relationship that I had, I always gave my everything, the best that I can be to make it work. I, instead of ending the relationship when I can see flaws, prayed and asked God to take away our feelings for each other, to give me a big crystal clear reason to end it or to help us find ways to improve it. My ex boy friends were nice to me and they are good people; i wouldn't have said yes to them if they weren't. However, for whatever reason that caused us to end, I just noticed that all of which had one common factor-it had eclipsed my personal relationship with God.

I said and did a lot of stupid funny things just because I was in love. I easily got hurt because things didn't go my way. I was funny and I am honestly not comfortable to look back at those times. Okay, it's fine for me to look back but just don't make fun of me because I said those things. It was fun and I was funny. It's not funny because I felt crazy for them, it was funny because they became my god. That's how our young love when we don't listen to our elders can turn to-a sort of worshiping an idol kind of thing; our bfs/gfs became gods in our lives.

What I learned from my past relationships is that even the best, in our own description, kind of love will never be enough to make us happy. We constantly change our love standards, people are sinful, fickle and unfaithful, and because of that human love will never be enough to make us happy.

Security and significance are two essential elements of emotional health; and we often rely on our human relationships to fulfill those essentials. We feel happy, complete and secure once we can constantly receive a gesture of affection from somebody who we love or even just by somebody who is important to us. A change or an absence of which can easily cause an imbalance to our emotional health.

God's love for us is everlasting, it will never change. It should be enough to provide us the security that we need in our lives. His love for us should be enough to let us know and feel that we are somebody in this world.

However, God understands our weaknesses as human and that's why through His grace and love, He provided us people to help us cope with those weaknesses. God gave us family, friends, romantic relationships and strangers to help us get through with our weaknesses and also, of course, for us to be the help in their lives. It's JUST a help. It shouldn't be our everything. It shouldn't be the only thing that can make us happy. We should understand that human relationships, human love is fleeting but God's love endureth forever.

He said, "I have loved you with an everlasting love." —Jeremiah 31:3

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1 comment:

Eaglewings said...

WOW that was an awesome post. Very profound and deeply moving. A great message and well developed thought. Thanks for sharing something so personal, I promise I will not laugh at your silliness if you promise to not laugh at mine. :)